HowToLiveWorse

CHAPTER 30 · 18 SOURCE ENTRIES

Raising School-Age Kids

上学以后的孩子

[← 回总目录](../README.md) 第 20 节讲的是孩子刚出生那一年。第 18 节算的是养孩子要花多少钱、多少时间。中间 3 到 18 岁这十几年，写在这一节。分龄管屏幕那一条从 0 岁写起，因为官方的分档就是 0～3 岁、3～6 岁、中小学三档，拆开写反而不好用。本节回答的是：「别耽误学习」和「身体」撞在一起的时候，哪些事不能等。这些事有时间窗口，过了就补不回来。学业该不该那么卷，本节不讨论，只给窗口和数字。 前八条、第 12 条（散瞳验光）、第 13 条（窝沟封闭）和第 15 到 18 条，算的是死亡和身体、心理上真落下的损害。其中第 16、17 条讲家里怎么管孩子：不打不骂，

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30-001
Evidence AlifespanSource-sensitive

Child reports sudden, worsening pain — rush to the hospital right away; don’t let him wait until after school.

孩子说突然剧痛、而且越来越重，立刻去医院，不要让他忍到放学

Some medical conditions are time‑critical — the outcome depends on how many hours pass from symptom onset. When a boy suddenly feels severe pain on one side of the scrotum, it may be testicular torsion: the blood vessels feeding the testicle become twisted, cutting off its blood supply. If treated within 6 hours, there’s a 97.2% chance of saving the testicle; after 19–24 hours that chance drops to only 42.5%. This kind of pain won’t wait until after school or until the end of an exam.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Child reports sudden, worsening pain — rush to the hospital right away; don’t let him wait until after school.” to Future Me's calendar

Future Me has a clearer calendar, more patience, and apparently the same responsibilities.

Today I keep a few minutes and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-002
Evidence AlifespanSource-sensitive

Don’t delay necessary treatment just to “wait until exams are over”; certain treatment windows depend on bone growth, not exam schedules.

该做的治疗别为了「等考完」往后拖，有些窗口跟着骨龄走，不跟着考试安排走

Scoliosis is a sideways curvature of the spine. A brace is a rigid shell worn on the back that helps keep the spine straight. When worn while bones are still growing, it greatly reduces the chance of needing surgery: 75% of patients wearing braces succeed, compared to only 42% who simply receive observation. This treatment window is tied to the timing of bone maturation, not to middle‑school or college entrance exams. Waiting until after exams often leaves surgery as the only option.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Don’t delay necessary treatment just to “wait until exams are over”; certain treatment windows depend on bone growth, not exam schedules.” to Future Me's calendar

If I do not open the notes, no new task has technically appeared.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-003
Evidence AlifespanSource-sensitive

When a child is bullied, report it to school the same day and request a written response; for physical assault, theft, or rumor spreading, call the police immediately.

孩子被欺凌，当天就报到学校并要求书面处理，涉及打人、抢钱、传谣的直接报警

Children who experience peer bullying are roughly 2.2 times more likely to have suicidal thoughts than those who are not bullied, and about 2.6 times more likely to attempt suicide. Schools must investigate any bullying report right away; if bullying is confirmed, disciplinary action must be taken against the offending students. In cases where bullying violates public order laws or may constitute a crime, schools cannot conceal the facts and must inform police. Therefore, reporting the incident the same day and demanding a formal written response is crucial — simply asking the teacher to “talk to him” is not enough.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “When a child is bullied, report it to school the same day and request a written response; for physical assault, theft, or rumor spreading, call the police immediately.” to Future Me's calendar

One more exception feels free because the bill arrives outside the current scene.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-004
Evidence AlifespanSource-sensitive

Ensuring that children spend at least 2 hours outdoors each day is currently the only myopia‑prevention method backed by randomized trials.

让孩子每天在户外待够 2 小时，这是目前唯一有随机试验支持的防近视办法

A randomized trial was conducted at 12 primary schools in Guangzhou: first‑grade students were given an extra 40 minutes of outdoor activity per school day. After three years, the myopia rate in these schools was 30.4 %, compared with 39.5 % in schools without the added classes — a reduction of 9.1 percentage points. The Health Commission recommends at least 2 hours of daytime outdoor time per day, or a total of 14 hours per week. Cloudy days and standing outside during recess also count.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Ensuring that children spend at least 2 hours outdoors each day is currently the only myopia‑prevention method backed by randomized trials.” to Future Me's calendar

I can spend longer deciding whether to start than the small action would take.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-005
Evidence Blifespan

No screen time for children aged 0–3; limit it as much as possible for ages 3–6; for school‑age kids, non‑educational screen use should not exceed one hour per day.

0 到 3 岁不给屏幕，3 到 6 岁尽量不给，中小学生非学习用途每天不超过 1 小时

The Health Commission has set strict guidelines: no screens for children aged 0–3, and they should be kept away from screens as much as possible for ages 3–6. For school‑age students, non‑educational screen use must be limited to no more than 15 minutes at a time and no more than one hour per day. The reasoning is that prolonged close‑up screen exposure depletes a child’s “far‑sightedness reserve,” leading to earlier onset of myopia. Research linking screen time directly to myopia isn’t as conclusive; the strongest evidence comes from studies showing that two hours of outdoor activity per day helps prevent myopia.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “No screen time for children aged 0–3; limit it as much as possible for ages 3–6; for school‑age kids, non‑educational screen use should not exceed one hour per day.” to Future Me's calendar

The routine already works until the day the source says it may not.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-006
Evidence AlifespanSource-sensitive

Treating myopia as a lasting injury: the higher the prescription, the greater the future risk of retinal detachment, macular degeneration, and glaucoma

把近视当成会留下的损伤：度数越深，将来视网膜脱离、黄斑病变、青光眼越多

Myopia does not go away on its own, nor does the prescription level decrease. It is far more than simply “wearing glasses.” Compared to people without myopia, those with mild myopia face a risk of myopic macular degeneration roughly 10–15 times higher; for individuals with a prescription of 600 degrees or more, this risk rises by several hundred times. The likelihood of retinal detachment is about three times higher for mild myopia and roughly 13 times higher for severe myopia. Therefore, the earlier a child develops myopia and the faster it progresses, the greater the long-term risks they must face.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Treating myopia as a lasting injury: the higher the prescription, the greater the future risk of retinal detachment, macular degeneration, and glaucoma” to Future Me's calendar

There is no immediate alarm, so the sensible choice can wait for a less busy week.

Today I keep a few minutes and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-007
Evidence Blifespan

Take a close look at your child’s annual school health report and follow up on any abnormalities right away.

每年那次学生体检的报告单要自己看一遍，异常项当年带去医院查

Every year, primary and middle schools conduct one health check for every student. The official guidelines list being overweight, obese, malnourished, having spinal curvature issues, poor eyesight, and dental cavities as key areas that need special attention. These problems are precisely the ones parents tend to put off dealing with. Don’t just glance at your child’s height and weight measurements and then file the report away. If any of these issues show up on the report, take your child to a specialist for a proper check-up that same year — don’t wait until the next annual check.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Take a close look at your child’s annual school health report and follow up on any abnormalities right away.” to Future Me's calendar

Future Me has a clearer calendar, more patience, and apparently the same responsibilities.

Today I keep a few minutes and avoid interrupting my default routine.

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30-008
Evidence BlifespanSource-sensitive

Conducting a depression screening for kids aged 12 to 18 — don’t rely on school mental health assessments as a diagnosis

12 到 18 岁的孩子做一次抑郁筛查，别拿学校的心理测评当诊断

The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recommends screening adolescents aged 12 to 18 for major depressive disorder, noting that the overall benefits are moderate and justify the effort. There is insufficient evidence to support screening for kids under 11. Suicide is the second leading cause of death among people aged 10 to 19. School mental health assessments conducted each academic year are population-wide screenings, not diagnostic tools. If a child reports feeling distressed, or shows sudden changes in eating, sleeping, interests, or academic performance, they should be referred to a psychiatrist or clinical psychologist right away.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Conducting a depression screening for kids aged 12 to 18 — don’t rely on school mental health assessments as a diagnosis” to Future Me's calendar

If I do not open the notes, no new task has technically appeared.

Today I keep a few minutes and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-009
Evidence Bmoney

Do not buy products or services claiming to “cure myopia” or “reduce refractive error”

不买号称能「治愈近视」「降低度数」的产品和服务

The State Administration for Market Regulation explicitly states that “under current medical technology, myopia cannot be cured.” Phrases such as “recovery,” “restoration,” “reducing refractive error,” “curing myopia,” “myopia remedy,” and “repairing refractive error” are classified as illegal marketing claims subject to strict enforcement. If you encounter any of these terms, you can safely rule out those products without further comparison. Devices such as eye-care instruments are considered medical devices, and e-commerce platforms must verify whether sellers are qualified to sell them.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Do not buy products or services claiming to “cure myopia” or “reduce refractive error”” to Future Me's calendar

One more exception feels free because the bill arrives outside the current scene.

Today I keep a few minutes and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-010
Evidence Btime-energySource-sensitive

Clear rules exist for sleep, homework, sports, and rankings; if schools fail to comply, parents can raise the issue

睡眠、作业、体育和排名都有明文规定，学校做不到可以提

These rules are all laid out in writing: elementary students must get 10 hours of sleep per day, junior high students 9 hours, and high school students 8 hours. Elementary classes generally start no earlier than 8:20 a.m., and junior high classes no earlier than 8:00 a.m. In 2025, an additional requirement was added that schools must provide at least 2 hours of combined physical activity per day, and students must not be ranked based on test scores. If your child consistently fails to get enough sleep, use these rules as a reference point rather than blaming the child for being slow to get ready.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Clear rules exist for sleep, homework, sports, and rankings; if schools fail to comply, parents can raise the issue” to Future Me's calendar

I can spend longer deciding whether to start than the small action would take.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-011
Evidence Btime-energySource-sensitive

Parents can request a temporary leave of absence for their child; the school must retain the child’s enrollment status for up to one year.

孩子撑不住了可以休学，学籍学校必须给他留着，最长 1 年

A temporary leave of absence is a fully established procedure. Parents or legal guardians submit a request, which the school then approves and forwards to the relevant education authorities for final authorization. Each request is valid for no more than one year; if the child still needs time off after that, a new request must be filed. During this period, the school is legally required to keep the child’s enrollment status intact. Therefore, the idea that taking a leave of absence “ruins” a child’s education has no basis in current policy. Exact implementation details vary by province; parents should contact the school’s academic affairs office or local education bureau for specifics.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Parents can request a temporary leave of absence for their child; the school must retain the child’s enrollment status for up to one year.” to Future Me's calendar

The routine already works until the day the source says it may not.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-012
Evidence Blifespan

If poor vision is detected, go to the hospital for cycloplegic refraction and follow up at the recommended intervals as advised by the doctor.

查出视力不良，去医院做散瞳验光，之后按医生给的间隔复查

Cycloplegic refraction involves using special eye drops that relax the eye’s focusing muscles, allowing an accurate measurement of refractive errors. This test is performed in hospitals and is the most reliable method for diagnosing myopia. The Health Commission confirms these drops do not harm healthy eyes and that vision returns to normal after they wear off. Do not rely on quick computerized refraction tests at optical shops for diagnosis, and do not withhold glasses from children out of fear that it will worsen their myopia.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “If poor vision is detected, go to the hospital for cycloplegic refraction and follow up at the recommended intervals as advised by the doctor.” to Future Me's calendar

There is no immediate alarm, so the sensible choice can wait for a less busy week.

Today I keep a little money, a few minutes and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-013
Evidence Alifespan

Pit and fissure sealants applied after permanent molars emerge

恒磨牙长出来以后做窝沟封闭

Pit and fissure sealants involve filling the grooves on the chewing surfaces of molars with a special resin so food particles can’t get trapped there. After two years, the chance of developing cavities on sealed teeth drops to roughly one‑eighth of what it would be without sealants. Without sealants, about 16% of tooth surfaces develop decay; with sealants, that figure falls to only about 5%. The protective effect remains evident even four years after application.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Pit and fissure sealants applied after permanent molars emerge” to Future Me's calendar

Future Me has a clearer calendar, more patience, and apparently the same responsibilities.

Today I keep a little money, a few minutes and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-014
Evidence Btime-energySource-sensitive

If a child loves playing games, first check whether sleep, homework, and outdoor activities are being crowded out — don’t just focus on how long they play.

孩子爱打游戏，先看睡觉、作业和出门活动有没有被挤掉，别光盯着玩了多久

Only about two or three out of every hundred kids truly meet the criteria for “gaming disorder.” If surveys use very low thresholds and target only teenagers, the rate naturally appears much higher. Real usage data from game companies shows almost no link between how much a child plays and how happy they feel. By law, minors may play games only from 8 PM to 9 PM on Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays, and public holidays.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “If a child loves playing games, first check whether sleep, homework, and outdoor activities are being crowded out — don’t just focus on how long they play.” to Future Me's calendar

If I do not open the notes, no new task has technically appeared.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-015
Evidence BlifespanSource-sensitive

If a child says they’re attracted to the same sex, don’t scold them, don’t kick them out, and don’t send them for “conversion therapy”: how your family reacts can affect whether they attempt suicide.

孩子说自己喜欢同性，别骂、别赶出家门、别送去「矫正」：家里的态度和他会不会自杀有关

Among Chinese middle‑school students, those who are attracted only to the opposite sex are far less likely to attempt suicide than peers who are attracted to the same sex or both sexes. International research shows that adolescents who face strong rejection from their families are much more prone to suicide attempts; those whose parents send them for “conversion therapy” are at the highest risk.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “If a child says they’re attracted to the same sex, don’t scold them, don’t kick them out, and don’t send them for “conversion therapy”: how your family reacts can affect whether they attempt suicide.” to Future Me's calendar

One more exception feels free because the bill arrives outside the current scene.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-016
Evidence AlifespanSource-sensitive

Do not hit your child, and do not yell or call them stupid: children who are often hit or verbally abused show more behavior and emotional problems

管孩子别动手打，也别吼骂、骂他笨：常挨打挨骂的孩子，行为和情绪问题都更多

Children who are often physically punished show more aggression and psychological problems, feel more distant from parents, and receive harsher beating. Whether spanking makes a child obey on the spot is unclear in the evidence. Adolescents who are often yelled at or called stupid at age 13 show more misconduct and depression the next year; warm parenting does not cancel that link.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Do not hit your child, and do not yell or call them stupid: children who are often hit or verbally abused show more behavior and emotional problems” to Future Me's calendar

I can spend longer deciding whether to start than the small action would take.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-017
Evidence AlifespanSource-sensitive

If parenting feels out of control and you keep hitting or yelling, take a class that teaches concrete parenting skills

孩子难管、自己总忍不住打骂，去上一期教具体做法的家长课

Parenting programs that teach specific techniques reduce children’s hitting and rule-breaking in randomized trials, and parents’ mood improves. Parents also hit and yell less — strongest right after the course, still present one to two years later but much smaller. Shanghai has run similar trials with positive results.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “If parenting feels out of control and you keep hitting or yelling, take a class that teaches concrete parenting skills” to Future Me's calendar

The routine already works until the day the source says it may not.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off
30-018
Evidence ClifespanSource-sensitive

Do not send a child to a closed boot camp to stop internet use through harmful confinement or punishment

别把孩子送进封闭管理的「戒网瘾学校」「特训营」：法律禁止用伤害身心的办法戒网瘾，已经有孩子被关死

Mainland China's Minors Protection Law prohibits methods that harm a child's physical or mental health. The source documents court cases involving serious abuse and criminal convictions at training schools.

Open the low-ROI detour

Move “Do not send a child to a closed boot camp to stop internet use through harmful confinement or punishment” to Future Me's calendar

There is no immediate alarm, so the sensible choice can wait for a less busy week.

Today I keep a few minutes, a bit of persistence and avoid interrupting my default routine.

Read the source and trade-off

Source snapshot: a994b6a0c90598b0fe15cb837343f438dbf7b95d. Every original stays available in Chinese alongside the English edition.